Monday, August 30, 2010

Choosing the Best Dish, Luke 10:38-42, Proper 11C

Preached Sunday, July 18, 2010
Luke 10: 38-42

........On their way to Jerusalem, Jesus and his followers passed through a certain village and accepted the invitation of a woman named Martha to share a meal in her home. Martha had a sister named Mary, who sat on the floor the moment Jesus arrived and hung on every word he said. Martha, on the other hand, was trying to prepare an elaborate meal for her guests and was getting more and more disturbed about it. She came in and said to Jesus, “Lord, doesn’t it bother you that my sister has left all the work to me? Tell her to get up off her butt and give me a hand.”
........But Jesus answered, “Martha, my dear Martha, you are preparing so many elaborate dishes when only one dish of food is really needed for our nourishment. Mary has chosen the right ‘dish’ and it is not going to be taken away from her.”


When I was growing up I often spent summer vacations on my grandparents’ farm in western Tennessee. It was a fabulous change of pace for me from life in metropolitan Chicago. It was sort of like leaving civilization and returning to the days of the pioneers because my grandparents still did much of the work of the farm the same way it had been done for hundreds of years before the advent of mechanical farming. That also meant that there were many social expectations that were 'taught' to me. One of those was: The men always eat first.

When it was time to eat the men would rush in from the fields where they had been working and crowd around the table while the women, even those who had worked in the same fields as the men, would serve them, get their drinks and deserts, and clean up after them. Even the little boys got to eat before the little girls. It was only when the men had finished eating the women sit down to eat themselves, sometimes not even getting the same food if the men had consumed all of what had been prepared. It was just the way things were done and for many years nobody seemed to question why there might be any reason to change it.

On quiet evenings when few others were around I did question my grandmother as to why she would still let the men eat first and the women second. I could understand the big middle of the day meals when lots of people were working together to plant or harvest the fields, but not the evenings at home with just family. She said that was the way it had always been done.

Now, you need to know that I was just as bossy as a child as I am as an adult. So I started telling my grandmother to sit down and eat while I waited on her. Not too long after that other family members began giving her the same honor...even at the mid-day meals on work days. She had earned a place of honor at the table with the men. I’m glad to report to you that after not too many years a new tradition was established in my family. Those who were the oldest men and women in the family were honored by being fed first at family gatherings, even on work days.

One of the problems we have in interpreting and understanding gospel stories like the one today is that we tend to read them alone, ripped away from their context, from the surrounding stories the author of the gospel has deliberately placed together for a purpose. This story is one of several where Jesus teaches his disciples about hospitality, about welcoming others into the New Community of God. Today’s gospel story speaks about the kinds of social expectations that Jesus’ own society had about men and women, about hospitality, and about eating together and enjoying each other’s company, especially enjoying time with a friend named Jesus.

We know from other gospel stories that Mary and Martha are sisters who live with their brother Lazarus in Bethany, just outside of the city walls of Jerusalem in the town of Bethany. Luke gives us none of those details in this story. Seemingly this story is way out of place geographically as Jesus and the disciples have just left Samaria and are not yet close to Jerusalem. Do remember, however, that the gospel writers weren’t necessarily reporting to us a day by day description of Jesus’ movements, nor where they especially knowledgeable or accurate about the geography of the Holy Land in their story telling. They were collecting stories about Jesus’ ministry and teaching and then putting those stories together based on themes within their gospels for particular purposes related to why they wrote the gospels and for the specific communities they were writing for, communities who also had special needs the authors wanted to address. So, it really doesn’t matter that we know that Jesus couldn’t be anywhere near Bethany since this is the beginning of his journey toward Jerusalem. What is important is the purpose that Luke has in telling us this story at this particular point in his gospel.

Mary and Martha and their brother Lazarus are a Queer family indeed. An unmarried man, or at least his wife is never referred to, and his two unwed sisters who certainly appear to be of marriageable ages present us with a very unconventional family for this time. Some have identified Lazarus as the Beloved Disciple that the author of the gospel of John refers to several times. Given the fact that Jesus apparently likes to hang out with these three siblings whenever he’s in the vicinity of Jerusalem, makes them look even queerer.

Some have gone so far as to suggest that Mary or her sister Martha might have been married to Jesus and this would account for his frequent visits to their home. Such thoughts bother some people, but not me. The thought that Jesus was a complete human being with love interests and perhaps a wife or a lover just doesn’t faze me like it might have many years ago when I was a young teenager still stuck in a fundamentalist religious community.

Jesus was well known as a man who enjoyed good food and good drink and the company of those that the social elite of his day would have been horrified to welcome into their homes. Jesus apparently knew how to have a good time or at least that’s what his adversaries kept accusing him of doing. Perhaps they were jealous of his popularity and had to come up with some reason why they shouldn’t be a part of the celebrations Jesus seemed to usher into existence just by his presence.

Normally in the gospels we would be told that Jesus had come into the home of a leading male citizen of the community for a dinner. However, on this day, Luke tells us that Jesus has come to the home of Martha. Identifying Martha as the main host for this occasion is very queer indeed and we probably need to ask ourselves why Luke does this.

Some of our sister theologians believe that this story is preserved by Luke, for it isn’t told by any of the other gospel writers, because it is a story that women who were followers of Jesus handed down to each other. Why might that be so?

This week the Catholic Church announced revisions in its laws pertaining to sexual abuse of minors by priests listing it as a moral crime and at the same time listed the ordination of women of women as one of the most serious crimes of sacrament against Church law. That they would list both in the same document, almost equating them as equally bad, has caused quite a stir among Catholics and others worldwide for it seemed to put the two crimes on equal footing. The Catholic Church has been quick to say that isn’t what it meant, but that the ordination of women is still a crime because Jesus didn’t have any female disciples. While it is true that we don’t have any women listed in any of the gospels or the book of Acts as being ‘official’ disciples of Jesus, we do know that Jesus was accompanied by a rather large group of women when he was traveling with his male disciples, and when the men are mentioned it is not unusual for the gospel writer to also list women who were present. From recent scriptures we have focused on we know that these women gave financial support to Jesus’ ministry out of their own wealth.

Given the social expectations of that historical time, it shouldn’t be surprising that even if there had been any official lady disciples that their names aren’t recorded in those listings, especially given the fact that all of the gospel writers we know about were apparently male. But, isn’t it interesting that we have this particular story about Mary and Martha as well as several other stories about women in the life of Jesus? Remember that all of the gospel stories were passed down from one generation to the next, from person to person, until they were finally written down as collections of the teachings of Jesus in what we now call the four gospels. Perhaps this is a story about two of the female disciples of Jesus.

We read that Jesus sent the 12 disciples ahead of him to make preparations for his journey through Samaria, a region known for its hate of Jews, and for being hated in return by Jews. Then we learned that Jesus sent out 70 of his followers with instructions to take a blessing of peace to Samaria and accept the peaceful hospitality of the Samaritans when it is given back to them. If that wasn’t lesson enough for everyone about the kind of hospitality that Jesus wanted his disciples to practice, Luke then has Jesus tell a story about a hated Samaritan who acts more like a neighbor to a man who has been beaten and robbed than a priest or a Levite, two of the most righteous men in all of the country.

This week's gospel story has Jesus and his followers descending upon the home of Mary and Martha who welcome him and the men with great hospitality. One commentary I read took the numbers of followers literally and said that Martha has opened her home up to over 83 men and the women traveling with them. If you showed up at my house with more than 80 of your friends and expected Mark and I to feed you and put you up for the night, I think I might freak out too. The probability is that Jesus a few friends came by that day, far less than 80.

Martha does the socially expected thing of a woman in her society as the oldest woman of the household and arranges a meal for Jesus and his followers, however many there might have been with him. Apparently Martha is an ancient version of Martha Steward and soon is organizing a meal, and the household to take care of her guests. She just forgets one thing, to be present with her guests, to enjoy their company, especially that of Jesus.

She is apparently a very competent woman and greatly respected for her abilities in giving hospitality as it would have been expected of her under the circumstances. However while she is dashing around the house, Martha apparently notices that something isn’t quite right with the situation because her younger sister, Mary, isn’t helping her. Instead Mary is sitting at the feet of Jesus with the men listening to him teach. That was not an action women normally took in that society. Women were not taught to read, write, nor invited to take part in scholarly discussions, at least not in public where they would be seen.

I for one think that this is one of the reasons this story probably proved so durable and was most likely told by women to women to support their being seen as full and complete disciples of Jesus, equal to any man. If Jesus had a reason to reject women from being a disciple or taking part in his teaching, he could have done it right at this point and believe me, if he had, the men who preserved these stories for us to read would have reported it just that way. But Jesus didn’t reject Mary or Martha. In fact, Jesus apparently was delighted that Mary was learning at his feet just like one of the men and he wasn’t going to take that away from her.

Now before we go further into the story about Mary and Martha, let me take just a moment and tell you about Claude…not his real name, but this is about a real person. Claude came into my church as a man of many talents. He was a very creative person who could organize large dinner parties for the church for special occasions complete with elaborate color coordination of flowers, table arrangements, table cloths, wall decorations, and even lighting.

To attend a feast that had been planned and executed by Claude was to partake of a fabulous celebration of color and sights and taste. He did such a great job that we asked him to be the church host and coordinate all the dinners and special events for the church.

Now when Claude was just volunteering his time and talents he was content and happy and everyone appreciated his work and applauded him and patted him on the back and told him how wonderful he was and Claude loved it. But when Claude took on the responsibility of coordinating the monthly potlucks and other events involving food Claude became a very different person. Claude began complaining that no one helped him, or at least not enough people helped him and those that did help didn’t help in the right way. Claude would overspend his budget and then complain when the church couldn’t reimburse him for expenses he hadn’t asked for approval before he bought his supplies.

One day when he had worked very hard, ignoring the help that others offered him because they just didn’t do things the right way, or at least not the way Claude would have done it, he overheard someone say that the mashed potatoes weren’t warm enough and he burst into angry tears and abruptly left the church without even saying goodbye. The rest of us had been having a great time enjoying the food and the fellowship and it took several hours to piece together the reason for Claude’s sudden disappearance.

Instead of enjoying the fellowship and the food that had been brought in by everyone, Claude had focused instead on some of the minor issues of the day, like how hot the potatoes were after they’d been sitting on the table for several minutes, not something that was that important, in fact, the person who complained took his plate and put in the microwave until his potatoes were warm enough for him to eat them. Claude would have probably been offended at that if he’d stayed around long enough to be offended by it.

After one more such event at a later potluck dinner, we decided that coordinating the dinners for the church wasn’t something that Claude could do with any reasonable pleasure and joy because his attitude was all wrong. So we went for months with no one in the position and guess what? I hate to say it, but even without the marvelous decorations and flower arrangements, we all enjoyed the dinners a whole lot more than we had when Claude took over and demonstrated his displeasure with all of the rest of us.

I suspect that Martha was a lot like Claude. Martha becomes perplexed that she has to direct all of the work herself...a considerable amount given the number of men who were possibly present and who were probably not helping with the meal. The Greek language used indicates that she is preparing a very elaborate meal probably consisting of many dishes, the ancient equivalent of a six or seven course dinner. Ostensibly she is doing this to honor Jesus as a guest in her home.

Before the dinner is served, however, Mary goes to Jesus to complain that Mary isn't helping her do the work. This in itself is not a hospitable thing for Martha to do; it is a huge break in etiquette. One does not burden one’s honored guest with family disputes, nor does one usurp the authority of the guest to get your own way. Martha apparently thinks that she knows Jesus well enough that she can expect him to agree with her complaint and that Jesus will therefore order Mary to get up and go and help Martha finish the meal preparations. There is so much wrong with what Martha does. But Martha is in for a surprise.

Let me pause for a moment and explain that many have misused this scripture to say that Jesus prefers those who lead contemplative lives of quiet reflection and study over those who lead lives of active service to others in the name of Jesus. People have created hierarchies in which Mary is the one to be honored for her devotion to Jesus and Martha is to be put down for her service oriented ways. But that isn’t what this story is about and never was. The church needs both those who are contemplative and those who give themselves in Christian service to others. Try to do church without either one and you don’t have much of a church. As I’ve said many times before to you, the problem is with Martha’s attitude, not with what she is doing. Attitude is everything!

Jesus answers: "Martha, my dear, Martha. You are worried about preparing an elaborate meal for me, when only one dish of food is necessary to satisfy our hunger. Mary has chosen the better 'dish' and I will not take it away from her." Jesus was not scolding Martha. He was using extreme terms of endearment in talking to her. I imagine him addressing her like I do one of my beloved grandchildren, with tenderness and total acceptance and absolute love. I believe Jesus was inviting Martha to sit down and enjoy some time with him, too, by listening to him and talking with him.

Given her bad attitude she apparently needed a big lesson on loving others with the right attitude. Spending time with Jesus was more important than fulfilling anyone’s social expectations of what a woman should do or even what a host should do. The most important guest in all of history was present in her home and she needed to stop and smell the flowers instead of worrying about which flowers to put in which vases to convey the best message of hospitality. In worrying about hospitality, Martha forgot to give hospitality to everyone, including to her sister Mary, or even to Jesus.

Being present with Jesus was the most important 'dish' of choice on the menu for the evening. Jesus doesn't restrict anyone from following him. God welcomes both women and men fully into a mutually meaningful relationship. Normal social expectations about gender roles are blown wide open in the New Community of God. Women can sit at the feet of Jesus and learn to be his followers, the same as men. Women can be pastors and priests and music directors and theologians and seminary professors, as well as deacons or lay leaders in the church. For that matter, men can be great cooks and hosts, or teach children, too, and do so in response to Jesus' call to his follower. When society tells us we have to live up to its social expectations about our gender, remember, those things aren't important neither to Jesus nor in God's New Community. Are you being too busy to spend time with Jesus this week?

When you can’t practice Christian hospitality, or when you don’t feel like giving Christian hospitality to another person, then you need to remove yourself from the situation and let someone else help that person. You may even need to call upon others to do for that person what you cannot do for him or her yourself. When your attitude about serving Christ and serving others in Christ’s name is not what it should be, then you need to stop and get your attitude readjusted. Doing the right thing may not be the right thing to do if your attitude is all wrong.

We treat life and others the wrong way. We usually want to know what we are going to get out of anything we might attend or anyone we might be with. Perhaps we need to start by asking ourselves what is it that we can give to others, what is it that others need from us? When we begin with the focus on ourselves, we fail to see the other people that God wants us to see, really see, and really care about.
As churches grow the members usually become more and more concerned about what the church is going to do for them, how is the church going to help them in life instead of how is the church going to care for its surrounding community and reach out to those who do not know what it might mean for them to be a part of the New Community of God. When we take our eyes and our hearts focus off of the surrounding community and we begin to focus only on our own needs and wants we might as well put up a sign at the door that says: No one else needed. No one else wanted. We’re too busy taking care of ourselves.

Martha was so busy taking care of those things that Martha thought was important that Martha forgot about being a friend to Jesus, about being a caring sister to Mary, and even about proper decorum be trying to involve Jesus in a family dispute to get her own way. As we continue to grow as a church there will be many choices before us, a whole smorgasbord of options, but it is my fervent hope that you and I will choose the best dish, that we will keep our eyes and our hearts focused on the best dish: being friends of Jesus, friends to each other, and friends to the world around us. Yes, we might need to take care of ourselves at times, but in taking care of ourselves, let us not lose our focus on the people around us, for that is who God sees and that is who God wants us to see. When Jesus saw someone in need, Jesus stopped what he was doing and cared for them. Jesus became their friend. He did that for Martha. It’s that simple: See a need and help. Be a friend to everyone…but with the right attitude.

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